Khan’s Report: Tales Trees Tell

[Vacaria Brotherhood] - D&D Expeditions: Tales Trees Tell

Khan (dwarf cleric), Sasha (human ranger), Lanza (half-elf bard), Septimus (tiefling warlock)

Previously: Many have been the expeditions around the city of Phlan that reveal the Cult of the Dragon’s inexorable rise in power in the region. Among many discoveries, Vacaria Brotherhood has compiled news about the imminent arrival of a black dragon.

Missing in the Forest

Lieutenant Aelid asks our help regarding some reports of people gone missing in the forest, and some hysteria pointing towards children stories about Jenny Greenteeth, a hag.

When we arrive in Cabal’s Hill, a Halfling named Grina tells us about a guy named Halvin that went into the Quivering Forest, apparently with intentions of reaching the elven town of Green Hall. The problem is that a long lasting pact between Phlan and the Quivering Forest forbids anyone from entering the forest. Several days after Halvin went missing, an expedition of eight townsfolk was sent in order to find him. None have returned.

Jenny Greenteeth

While we speak with Grina, screams echo in the night. Outside, a guy is nailed to a pole, with his eyes removed, his tongue sliced, and a stake driven into his chest. He is in excruciating pain. Sasha draws a dagger in order to cut his throat and put him out of his misery, but fortunately Lanza is able to stop her. I use my divine magic to ask Marthammor Duin for guidance, and heal the poor fellow, which collapses, but survives!

Where his eyes had once been, two stones with Jenny Greenteeth’s runes now stand. In the stake, there are eight papers that the townsfolk took with them, saying they don’t want to disrespect the pact, and they’re just looking for a missing companion.

When the guy regains conscience, Lanza casts Detect Thoughts and tries to communicate with him. He sees the hellish vision of a hag. I pay the ferryman five gold pieces to take the suffering man immediately to Phlan, where he can be properly treated.

Not another imp!

Some of you may recall that one of my “adventuring companions” is a disgusting tiefling with an imp, which doesn’t go marvelously well with “righteous neutral good Harper dwarven cleric”. So you can imagine my enthusiasm when we discover ANOTHER imp, killing cows in the town.

The bloody creature’s name is Pipyap, and he “belongs” to Halvin, which we find out that is a member of the Cult of the Dragon, and also a servant of Asmodeus.

Oh, great… So, I look around and how many Harpers do I see? NONE! And how many FUCKING-HELLISH-DAMNED-BASTARD-DEMON-WORSHIPERS? Countless ones, everywhere. This is going to be a lonely ride…

After reading Halvin’s diary we also discover that he has been commanded by the Cult of the Dragon to break the pact between Phlan and the Quivering Forest. I choose this moment to announce to my comrades that Halvin stopped being a goal for me. I will do every effort to rescue the remaining villagers, but will not move a finger to help a servant of Asmodeus that works for the Cult of the Dragon.

Serelis, the ranger

With no other option but to enter the forest, we do so. May Marthammor Duin bless our steps.

We reach the hut of Serelis, a ranger that has good relations with Cabal’s Hill. He tells us the townsfolk passed through him some days ago, and that he provided the help he could. But he suspects they are all dead by now, either at Jenny’s hands, or the elves’. None too soon, we are attacked by a pack of needle blights and scarecrows. Apparently, Jenny wishes to make her presence felt.

Elves and panthers (no, nothing Drizzt-related)

Following our trek along the forest we are greeted by the elves. And by “greeted” I mean hailed with dozens of arrows. Lanza, in his quite peculiar manner, tries to act like some sort of boisterous buffoon, and a volley of elven arrows lodge in his chest. I recall a very similar situation not so long ago. This could easily end our lives. I open my hands to show I’m not hostile, and repeat, time and again, what is our purpose. The harassment from the elves stops. At least for now.

Alternatively, the harassment from the pixies begins! Lanza is chosen as a target for their pranks. After some “awkward intercultural moments” one decides to lead us towards “one of our friends”. We discover one of the villagers, already dead. Killed by displacer beasts… which decide that we are the main course of today.

We fight against two of those panthers with tentacles, and barely escape with our lives (and only do so thanks to Sasha’s wolf, by the way…).

The little welcoming hut in the forest

Deciding not to disturb the elves, we head towards the place where we expect to find Jenny.

Once upon a time, in a warm clearing in the forest, there was a friendly little hut, with a yummy-smelling cauldron, and a nice warm-hearted hospitable old lady… with two guys hanging in a cage.

Hmmm… this must be the weirdest child story I’ve ever heard. The nice old lady invites my comrades to sit and enjoy her stew… and they do so! I am baffled. Ignoring this masquerade, I head to the cage and try to free the captives. The nice old lady casts Hold Person on me. I pass the save, but am alerted to her power. My friends are all cheer and laughter with the old crone, while she accuses me of being rude and not being willing to benefit from her kindness. She speaks of the old pact between Phlan and the Quivering Forest, and how we (the people of Phlan) have chosen to disrespect it, while they have countless times dealt with foreign threats that may have reached the city. But – in her immense epic generosity – she is magnanimously willing to establish a new pact. Lanza is beyond excited, already envisioning a treaty with his name stamped on it. Before discussing the new terms, my companions ask about the villagers. Friendly Jenny confirms that some have been killed by the elves, one has been killed by the displacer beasts, two are hanging in the cage, one she sent to Cabal’s Hill with a stake through the chest, and the others… she looks to the cauldron, at the exact same time that Pipyap, the imp, spits a ring from his mouth.

Negotiations are over for me. I cast Hold Person on the bitch, she fails the save, and I run to her drawing a pair of manacles from my pack. My move was so unexpected that even the DM wanted to look into my character sheet to confirm I had the manacles with me. But dice are dice, and when I try to restrain the hag I roll a 1.

Nevertheless, my intentions are now quite obvious. I am not going to bargain any kind of pact with a hag that just confirmed being the person behind the gruesome attack on the guy tied to the pole, and that just served “soup-made-of-villagers” to my comrades-at-arms.

The other players are mad at me for breaking the negotiations, but that is the burden of being the only Good-aligned character in the group. Lanza and Septimus are refusing to act against the hag, and when Sasha drags her by the hair with the intention of throwing her into the cauldron, Septimus blocks the path.

The divisions among the groups allow the hag to escape, transforming into a bulk of worms and vanishing in the earth. The winds howl our names, with Jenny’s promise of vengeance upon us, and vengeance upon Phlan.

One does not reason with Evil

We return to Cabal’s Hill with the two remaining villagers, which reveal that Jenny had also proposed them to form a new pact. Much discussion brews amid our group. Tension is palpable, and positions become extremed. I stand resolute in defending my actions. One does not reason with Evil. We do not look the other way when innocent blood is spilled. Righteousness may have a cost, but that is a price I am willing to pay.

Septimus does not cease to hassle me about what happened, and insists that I am responsible for anything that goes wrong in the future. Well, his prophecy doesn’t take much time to be fulfilled. The ranger, Serelis, comes to town, wounded, saying that the elves have declared war on Phlan, and an alliance with Jenny and the Cult of the Dragon. Already caravans have been assaulted.

Septimus displays a mocking smile, and starts clapping while he looks at me.

“Well done, Khan... WELL DONE!”

My hand tightens around my warhammer, while my burning eyes lock into the tiefling’s. I call, silently, upon my god’s guidance to temper my blood, in order to avoid doing something I may regret…

---

Report to Wise Owl Gabriel Emmeritus

My friend,

You have always been a wise tutor, and a trustworthy ally. Like me, you are among the few people in this region that understands our role as beacons of unflinching hope against all forms of Evil.

As I have confided to you previously, grave times are approaching Phlan and the surrounding region. The Cult’s grasp spreads with inexorable power. Beyond the “black problem” I mentioned about the marshes, something Evil runs with the winds of the Quivering Forest. An alliance between savage elves, a powerful hag, and the Cult is on the rise. Innocent blood has been spilled, and I fear much worse if we don’t take action swiftly. In order to mount a preemptive defense, I urge you to mobilize the necessary goods to establish a forward post with enough men to protect the surrounding region. I believe Lepanto and Lewyn are able and battle-tested fighters, capable of assuming the necessary responsibilities. I am willing to offer part of the coin I have in order to fund the wages of the recruits.

Regarding the adventuring companions that Marthammor Duin has chosen to accompany my travels, it is my firm belief that Septimus is beyond all hope of salvation. He seems pleased with the considerable power his devil master provides him, and I doubt he’ll ever willingly turn from it.

Don’t trust any word you hear from Lanza. He is a delusional, erratic, egocentric maniac. He has allegiance to none but himself, and lies with the same swiftness that I brand my hammer against the undead.

Sasha remains a wildcard. I have absolutely no idea what is her agenda. Some of her actions are questionable, but while her bow is aimed at our enemies, I can have a good night’s sleep.

Respectfully,

KHAN

The Righteous Hammer

Khan’s Report: Drums in the Marsh – Part 2

[Vacaria Brotherhood] - D&D Expeditions: Drums in the Marsh

Khan (dwarf cleric), Klin (elf druid), Lanza (elf bard), Septimus (tiefling warlock)

Previously: People have gone missing in the farmsteads around the Twilight Marshes. On his way to Gilthanas’ marriage, the gnome Archibald decides to investigate… and disappears.

Recycling Characters

We rescued a bunch of people being driven in rafts by the lizards. A friendly dwarf named Kill Him told us that a competition was being held in the Island of the Lizard King (no, I'm not talking about Japan and Godzilla), involving three tribes: Dusk-Dusk, Gob-Gob, and Jib-Jib.

Alas, the freed farmers needed someone to guide them along the swamps, so four of our party members were volunteered to accompany them (yeeeah, the players were absent and we had to dispatch their characters...). But alongside the friendly Kill Him (dwarven baker extraordinaire) we discovered my good friend Lanza (bard not-quite-so-extraordinaire, but really smart) and the druid Klin (that somehow got teleported from another campaign, in another time, in another place).

The Hermit, The Dragon, and The Horned Ones

Kill Him told us to visit the hermit named Gregor that lived in the swamp. I have absolutely no idea what transpired inside Gregor's hut, because the entire time was spent with Septimus speaking with Gregor and the imp in abyssal. Yup, the horned guy with the imp was the single one remaining from the original ensemble (why me, Marthammor Duin... why me...).

The hermit eventually told us that a COLOSSAL BLACK DRAGON was the one responsible for the lizards' competition. Oh, joy… this just keeps getting better...

With the Island of the Lizard King's location in mind, we carried on.

When we felt that the beating of the drums was close, we halted our march. It was night, and we spotted a strange big lizard destroying several effigies that resembled a dragon. Septimus tried to allure him into an ambush, but the guy didn't fall for it. In that moment, our horned warlock decided to unleash an eldritch blast on the lizard... but apparently his batteries were out. Humm... what could possibly be the reason for his magical powers to wane so suddenly? When he answered that question, the world stood still.

"My patron, Mephistopheles, the Archlord of the Eight Hell, has denied me access to the arcane powers."

We must bear in mind that I am playing with a righteous dwarf cleric. Remember the guy who was protecting the pouch with the 15 gp belonging to the old folks from the farm, who is also a Harper agent? Yup, that's me.

The entire party fell silent, and looked at me in expectation. Ok, NOW is the time to roleplay. I wasn't going to attack another player's character (unless he harmed me in any way), but obviously I wasn't going to simply dismiss this info as "nothing to see here, move along". So, I displayed my most serious dwarven-face and questioned my companions if we were going to make the final assault on the lizards having at our side a servant of an archdemon that could - and probably would - betray us at any moment.

Septimus argued that I was judging him too quickly, and that his servitude wasn't a question of choice. Instead, he was bound by something previous to his birth. An interesting exchange of arguments followed, in the eternal struggle between good and evil, and the tiefling eventually revealed that Mephistopheles ordered him to kill the hermit, which he refused.

At that moment I considered hitting the imp with a Guiding Bolt, but my spell slots as a 3rd level cleric are very limited, and we had already decided to press the attack on the island this night.

GOB-GOB! GOB-GOB! GOB-GOB!

We had to be pragmatic. Albeit the issues with "Hellboy", we needed manpower to hit the lizards and free the captives.

Although Lanza is far from being among the 100 best bards of the Moonsea (teeheehee), we must remember that he is one of the smartest persons in the region (Hello-Kitty-Headband of Intellect). So, he decided to do the SMARTEST THING POSSIBLE: steal the flag from the Dusk-Dusk camp and run around shouting "GOB-GOB! GOB-GOB! GOB-GOB!" And thus another memorable moment was born in Vacaria Brotherhood's history.

Mayhem ensued, and the lizards started killing each other. At that precise moment, the imp decided to attack the tiefling. And there we were, dear readers: a bard running insanely with a horde of lizardmen in pursuit, a tiefling in mortal kombat with his own imp, and my righteous dwarf being cooked alive inside the chainmail by the tribal shaman's Heat Metal. Thankfully we had the bear-shaped druid to do something!

Amid the chaos, the big lizard who had escaped our ambush appeared from nowhere and assumed control. While we tried desperately to free all people from their cells, the Megalizardtron gathered all the tribes under him. The druid rushed to free all the animals captured in cages... and was trampled! Yes, there was a stampede of chickens, sheep, goats... and one cow!

Megalizardtron ordered all the lizards to throw javelins at us. Our DM is a kind, loving, merciful person, and so decided to roll a d20 to see how many javelins would hit us... and rolled 19. I hate the DM.

My brave Khan, seeing that death was upon us with a stampede of lizardmen coming our way, started unleashing Guiding Bolts at Megalizardtron. My comrades started losing crossbow bolts towards him, and when we felled the bastard... the lizards ran away!

Marthammor Duin be praised.

The One and Only Lizard King in the Universe

The "Protector of the Fifteen Coins" and The Missing Gnome

We managed to organize the panicking prisoners, but not a single gnome was among them. Where the hell could Archibald be? Well, at least I found the old farmers alive and restituted the pouch with the 15 gp to its rightful owners. No one can accuse this Harper of not keeping his promises!

We told the people to take refuge in Phlan, since we had learned that the COLOSSAL BLACK DRAGON would be returning in a ten-day. After a few days walking the marshes, and with the inn on our sight, guess what happened? We found Archibald. The dumb gnome had spent the entire time running in circles.

Now, about the horned fellow...

The day was saved. Well, Archibald tried to ruin it by summoning a fire elemental in the barn... Oh, and apparently Gilthanas' marriage went down the drain... But aside from that, all is well when it ends well!

There was, nevertheless, one loose end: Septimus! I confronted eye-to-eye (you'll understand pretty soon the pun in this...) my comrade-in-arms with his forthcoming choices. I wasn't about to allow a servant of Mephistopheles to go back to Phlan. But, if his claim to be innocent in the entire "demon pact" thing was true, I would be willing to look for powerful allies among the Harpers in order to help freeing him from servitude. My insight told me he was genuinely willing to explore this path.

The Eye of Septimus

There is, although, one minor detail that we are unaware of in-game: Septimus' powers only returned because he pledged to Mephistopheles his willingness to sacrifice one of his eyes. Will this go forward? And, if so, will the DM take the chance to further develop this seed and make this a powerful trinket in the future? We... shall... SEE! >:)

Khan's Report: Drums in the Marsh - Part 1

[Vacaria Brotherhood] - D&D Expeditions: Drums in the Marsh

Were I to make a joke D&D-themed and it would start like this: two Harpers, two evil-looking warlocks, and two rogues walk into a bar...

Well, I'm not much of a joker, but let me tell you about my last D&D session... This is EXACTLY how it happened!

When the brainiacs at WoTC decided to promote the D&D Encounters (and Expeditions) as a support to D&D's 5th Edition they weren't exactly pushing us into a conundrum. I mean, it's easy to calculate the odds of having six complete strangers walk into a public game having totally incompatible characters!

Is it possible to have both Harpers and Zhentarim in the same party? Check!

Is it possible to have neutral good dwarven clerics and shady warlocks with imps as familiars? Check!

So, yeah, my neutral good dwarven HARPER cleric decided that his ZHENTARIM tiefling comrade-in-arms was simply a guy wearing a kabuki mask, and that his evil-as-fuck devilish IMP was... just an exotic bird!

Otherwise I would need years of therapy in order to understand why exactly we were banding together. You know, because, TIEFLING ZHENTARIM WARLOCKS WITH IMPS AS FAMILIARS are usually what HARPER DWARVEN GOOD CLERICS hunt in the campaign! So forget about any MINOR INCONSISTENCIES in all of this...

So, there you have our starting point for the "Drums in the Marsh" quest. And, yes, we were walking into a bar...

And the reason we were doing it was to search for the missing Best Man for our friend Gilthanas' marriage. A gnome named Archibald something-something-something yet-more-something XIV apparently disappeared while travelling to Phlan. We headed towards an inn in the middle of the road, where we were told that "Archie" had been there, but decided to go into the marsh to investigate the strange drums that sound in the night, and its link to several missing persons from the farmsteads nearby.

This farm boy comes to us in shock, having just returned from the farm belonging to the old couple he works for, finding it attacked, and with the old folks missing.

We take the ferry and rush upriver to the farmstead. On arrival, we observe that the doors were blasted, there were signs of claws on the floor, and marks of cattle being driven out of the farm.

So, do we decide to run after the assailants while the marks are fresh? Well, no...

"Hey guys, look! There's a pouch with 15 gp above the table. It must be the old folks’ savings. Well, let's just steal it..."

This is one of those moments where you can do one of two things:

a) Forget about your character's personality and simply ignore anything roleplay related;

b) Stay in-character and go against five other players, thus earning their hatred both in-character and out-of-character.

Well, with almost 20 years of roleplay over my shoulders this wasn't going to be the first time I'd break character just to gain popularity points. Therefore, Sergeant Khan put his most judging stare over his beard and claimed: NON!

45 minutes later they were still trying to convince me that we were entitled to the pouch because the old folks were probably dead. After much debate the thieving bastards ended up agreeing to give me the coins for safekeeping until the farmers' destiny became known.

My gut feeling was so right about my esteemed companions that as soon as we started the session I told the DM: I'm gonna leave my money (200 gp) entrusted to the Harpers' bank before we leave town..." 

Jumping into a barge we sailed upstream, but not before another 45 minutes were lost deciding who was going to row...

*Sigh*... Next time I'm bringing a pony...

 Yes, that is a pig inside the barge.

Suddenly, LIZARD MEN! Rising from the waters and throwing nets from the margins. Eldricht blasts, and spears, and arrows, and everything, shooting everywhere. Yay, it's HAMMER TIME! I swing my warhammer... and the die rolls below 4. More eldricht blasts, more arrows, more hits and bumps! I swing my warhammer... and the die rolls below 4. Some comrades get poisoned from the lizards' blowguns, and I don't have enough spells to cure them all. But since it is not lethal, and wears off after one hour, I swing my warhammer... and the die rolls below 4.

Humm... I'm starting to notice a peculiar consistency with my warhammer.

My fellow Harper is put unconscious and dragged by two lizards through the reeds. They would get away with him, if not for my providential guiding bolt shot from inside the barge in the middle of the river. Yes, you can say it: I'm totally awesome. After smoking one of them, they got scared and ran away.

Nightfall was upon us and we needed to rest. Both warlocks said "oh, it's cool, our familiars can stand watch". The tiefling tells his imp to stand watch, and the answer he gets (in Infernal) is something along the line of "sod off". The tiefling throws a stick at the imp. The imp catches the stick and bashes the tiefling in the head with it. Confused, my dwarf watches the entire scene thinking "hmmmm, what an interesting relationship the kabuki masked guy has with his exotic bird..."

We jump into the barge once again, and this time it only takes 38 minutes to decide who would pick up the oars.

A few miles later a giant pinkish tentacle-like thing sprouts out of nowhere and grabs the female warlock.

Prepare yourselves, hentai time is about to start.

We dock the ferry in the right margin and start attacking a half-hidden giant toad. That is when the OTHER giant toad on the LEFT margin decides to "tentacle-grab me" and pull me near him. Oh, this is gonna be great... The other five guys are on the other side, and I have this friendly giant toad all to myself. No problem! I start swinging my hammer... and the die rolls below 4. I scream, and shout, and let it all out, swing my hammer again... and the die rolls below 4.

Showing some solidarity, one of the other players tells me: Well, that die is cursed. Here, try rolling this one.

At this point you are all already guessing what did happen. That's right. I rolled a 1. The toad swallowed my warhammer.

...

...

Yeeeah, around this time I'm pretty much thinking I should've stayed home combing my beard. Eventually, the toad is blown by an eldritch blast from the kabuki dude, and now comes the epic scene: I grab my warhammer midair, turn around, decide to spend the "inspiration" I had gained previously, and unleash a thunderous guiding bolt straight at the other toad across the river! The evil marsh batrachian gets toasted, and one of the other players just kicks him dead.

Never mind combing the beard, this dwarf IS GAME!!!!

(to be continued)